Wednesday, November 12

generosity is not a pathology

i'm reading a book that's rocking my world: It's by Tracy Kidder and titled Mountains Beyond Mountains: The Quest of Dr. Paul Farmer, A Man Who Would Cure the World

Paul Farmer is an anthropologist and physician, professor of medical anthropology at Harvard and an attending physician at Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston. He currently resides in Cambridge, MA, but spends over half of his year in Haiti and various other project sites. His medical specialty is infectious diseases. Farmer is one of the founders of Partners In Health (PIH), an international health and social justice organization. (all jacked straight from Wikepedia).  His mission from about the age 21 has been to provide healthcare - preventative and defensive - to every person regardless of how much money they have or don't have.  His every day is centered around this aim in a very provocative and self-sacrificing way. In the words of Tracy Kidder, Paul Farmer offers, "another way of thinking about a place like Haiti.  But his way would be hard to share, because it implied such an extreme definition of a term like 'doing one's best.'"

In 1993 the MacArthur Foundation gave him one of its so-called genius grants ($220,000).  He donated the entire sum to PIH to create a research branch.  His salary from Harvard and the Brigham totalled $125,000, but he never sees his paychecks for those or the roaylties from his lectures and writings.  The bookkeeper at PIH cashes his checks, pays the bills - and his mother's mortgage - and puts whatever is left in the treasury.  On day in 1999, Farmer tried to use his credit card and was told he had maxed it out, so he called the bookkeeper.  She told him, "honey, you are the hardest working broke man i know."

at one point, dr. paul turns to tracy (the author of the book who has been studying dr. paul for several months) and says quite pointedly, "When others write about people who live on the edge, who challege their comfortable lives - and it has happened to me - they usually do it in a way that allows a reader a way out. You could render generosity into a pathology, commitment into an obsession. That's all in the repertory of someone who wants to put the reader at ease rather than conveying the truth in a compelling manner. I want people to feel unhapppy about Lazarus (a patient) and all the others who are shafted. otherwise why would I have you with me? I don't have a lot at stake in how you depict me. I've been yelled at by generals and denounced by people who don't have any data when I have a shitload. It does no harm to me, but plenty to my patients."

I'm not quite ready to start posting on the ideas rolling around in my head, but I must admit that it has me unsettled. uneasy. unsatisfied with my miniscule plans that ultimately only serve myself.

to whom much has been given, much is expected. i needed to be reminded of just that.